Church For Tomorrow

It is difficult to maintain a healthy community when some local church members or friends seem incapable of self regulation. We all need to exercise healthy boundaries inside our communities of faith. One local church worked for 3 and one half hours to develop the following Covenant of Respect (as recorded in the book 10 Temptations of Church; Why Churches decline and what to do about it) It changed their culture. It changed their life together.

1-Trust in the best intentions of those around you. Seek to understand and provide a positive environment for healthy discussion and conflict.

2-Be a truth and reconciliation person for whom every meeting, every utterance, every gesture is about truth and reconciliation in the best interests of the Church.

3-Create in yourself an openness to change as part of God’s creation, an opportunity for growth and revelation. Embrace others and create an open and inviting atmosphere for others to participate.

4-Open your heart and mind to God,s love, as incarnate in Jesus, reducing your anxiety and drawing you toward reconciliation and being a reconciler.

5-Trust that God is present in all parties in the midst of a disagreement. Seek common ground and options to reach consensus.

6-Provide the same courtesy, respect, and understanding to others as you would have offered to you.

7-Do not gossip about the church, the members, or its leaders.

Every Church for Tomorrow must develop a covenant of respect. No need to use this one, develop your own. For this local church, everyone in the ruling body signed it and pledged to live by it, modeling healthy behavior for others. Leaders will hold each other accountable for these healthy behaviors.  My favorite is # 7. Which one is your favorite?

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Rutger’s basketball coach was suspended for his behavior this past summer. He threw basketballs at players, berated them, shoved them around the court and screamed homophobic slurs at them. You can watch it all, just google “Rutger’s basketball coach” and it is there for everyone to see. His punishment? 75k dollar fine and a 3 game suspension. Why was this guy not fired? (he was fired at 8am Arizona time, after this post was written)

At one UMC on Easter morning a church member, and the United Methodist Men’s president, printed out a flyer blasting the pastor. He made copies on the church copy machine. He then walked out to the curb and personally handed out the flyer to everyone coming to worship that day.

At still another UMC, on Easter Sunday, during the fellowship hour with a room full of people, one member of the church screamed at the pastor loud enough for the whole room to hear ”You’re an ass………” This is not the first time she has failed to exercise adult boundaries. She has cursed the pastor before, she has broken a phone in the church office, and she has shouted “you are a liar!” to the administrative assistant. I could go on and on but you get the picture. Her punishment? Nothing so far. Absolutely nothing. She is still a member in good standing.

I know churches have a hard time putting boundaries on their members. I know churches have a hard time holding members accountable for their bad behavior. “That’s just the way Linda is,” churches say “she has been doing stuff like that for years. We try to ignore it and hope it will go away.” This congregation continues its precipitous decline. Is there a correlation between this offensive, unboundaried behavior and the decline of the church? Absolutely!

The small church that has been in decline for years. The leadership pool is limited. Often times there is a job in the church and there are no willing leaders to take that job. This name calling, obscenity shouting member has been called on to do two of those jobs. It has gone beyond simple boundaries for members, it is now a question of who is an appropriate leader inside the local church.

The purpose of all churches is “to make new disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.” On Easter Sunday morning there were dozens of potential new disciples sharing food and fellowship in the social hall. Do you think this member/leader’s outburst or the flyer from the UMM president was a help or a hinderance to the primary purpose?

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As we enter Holy Week, I remember the last thirty-two Holy weeks of my ministry.  They were all characterized by my deep hope for the week, the incredible times of high demand — both of energy, time and details, and the sense of the weight of what we do.

If you pastor a church, I hope this Sunday each of you will have new faces, people who don’t normally attend whom we affectionately call our C&E people.  Alongside the new clothes, children excited by sticky Easter baskets and melted chocolates, and Easter lilies with their heady scent, are the people who come to worship with us.  Some come out of a deep, abiding faith; some come out of  habit or duty.    I think all of them come, though, with this desperate hope:  that the gospel we proclaim is really true.  Even those who scoff, even those who are indifferent, underneath the jadedness is still the deeper hope that the message of resurrection and new life is real.  The atheist hopes to see her dead mother again; and the agnostic hopes to see a lost sibling.  All parents who have lost children or spouses, believers and non believers alike, hope the wildest hope of all – that they will hear their child’s voice, and they will touch their beloved’s face.

It’s sobering to realize they come first wanting to know if we believe it’s true.  If you struggle with this, it’s no time for feeling guilty.  Each path of faith contains its own trajectory; trust that you are on yours.  We all know doubt is a part of faith, so preach the risen Christ through your own doubts and in the face of your own fears.  As Wesley himself said, preach it till you believe it.  But preach and lead with that hope first in your mind.   Above all, be authentic.  This is the missing element in so much organized religion today, so surprise them with your authenticity.

I am praying for each of you during this time, church pastors as well as extension appointments, leaves and retired pastors. Because we carry this Sunday together, I am counting on this fact – when services are over, and your lunch is digesting, that you will not do a lick of work.  None.  Rest, relax and recreate yourself into the evening with deep breaths and laughter.  I will make as many services as I can, but I wish I could be in every church with each of you.  Peace,  Karen Vannoy

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I was in an airport. I was flying home. My plane was delayed. I was filled with stress and then an airline employee made this announcement over the intercom. “Ladies and Gentlemen, we are sorry for the inconvenience you have suffered in this wait. Due to weather problems, flight number 1506 will be delayed in departure for your destination. Our new departure time has been pushed back 20 minutes to 5:05 pm. We apologize for this delay and thank you for your patience.

First, let me say that I hate when people thank me for my patience when I do not have any patience. I was irritated, and felt hostile towards the entire airline. I was grumpy and I wanted to get home.  I withheld voicing these feelings because I did not want to show up on some reality show having a meltdown at the reservation desk. Secondly, it is bad enough to subject travelers to delays on the last leg of their flight home, but for God’s sake, tell the truth about it. There was no possible way we would be taking off at 5:05. It was already 4:45 and the plane had not yet arrived at the gate. Passengers needed to deplane from the last trip, the cabin needed to be cleaned and resupplied, the flight crew was scheduled to change, and everyone in the waiting area needed to board. If we were lucky we would push back from the terminal by 5:30, not 5:05. Why can’t the airline employees just tell just tell us the truth? Contrary to that famous line from A Few Good Men, we can handle the truth.

Churches are like the airlines. We don’t tell the truth about things that might upset people. The last 2 churches I served were in 20-25 year declines before I arrived and yet no one said so out loud. When the beloved church member asked to sing special music during Sunday morning most in attendance told her it was great even though she, only occasionally hit pitch. The pastor, in desperate need of continuing education to improve her preaching shakes hands with parishioners at the door who say “good sermon preacher,” and the sermon was really lame. We behave this way and say these things because we “don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.”

We can never change what is wrong unless we begin to tell the truth about what is going on. What do you think? Are church people too nice?

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There is a conventional wisdom in the established church today that leaders need to be patient. For newly elected church leaders that means take your time, learn what has historically been happening. Educate yourself in the way things have been done. This way you both honor the past and earn the needed credits to institute necessary change. For clergy it is not much different. Most clergy take similar advice. “Go slow” we are told. Get to know the people. Let the people know that you love them and only then do we have the credits to bring about change. Honor venerable members and leaders as well as their distinctive local church culture and then after one year’s time, take baby steps in making changes.

This methodology does not work. Do not hear what I am not saying. I think building relationships and loving the people in your congregation is critical but it is not the end all. What if the local church culture is not healthy? What if the existing culture is not aligned with our purpose make new disciple of Jesus for the transformation of the world? True leaders realize that;

1. In the honeymoon period of that first year, there is generally permission to institute changes which will help us achieve the purpose of our organization. Love the people and challenge long standing practices which serve insiders rather than serving  the unchurched we hope to reach.

2. There will develop a tacit assumption that you approve of everything just the way it is if we, as leaders, delay changes that need to be made. Dysfunctional behaviors, identified in that first week, left in place for a whole year, lead people to believe that you support the operation when in reality, you do not. You are simply waiting for the magical year to end before making changes.

3. The church for tomorrow needs bold leaders for the gospel. There is an urgency among us. We must take risks and think outside the box! Building relationships, prayer, Bible study, and honoring the history of our churches are good things but….. these things alone will not sustain and grow the church.

Again, leadership development is critical. I would remind you of what one pastor reported to another “I have been trained to be a teacher, preacher, and counselor but no one ever trained me to be a leader.”

I made a formal announcement of my candidacy for Pope at the Claremont seminary (CST) board meeting. I seek to solidify the United Methodist vote with this blog entry. The following are my qualifications;

1. I believe in the catholic church. I know that has a small “c” rather than a capital “C” but still it is still catholic.

2. I can clean up that financial mess and my butler will not be allowed to handle sensitive, secret, Vatican financial documents. Leaks of sensitive information will be used for testing public opinion alone, not for exposing corruption within my Papal court.

3. I will keep other secrets as well. I will ask my children to use the back door to the Papal residence when they come to visit and Karen has agreed to reside in a basement Vatican apartment to keep from drawing unwanted attention to our life together.

4. I will gladly wear the Papal hat. In my most recent physical I have learned that since turning 60 I have shrunk half and inch in height. The hat will help me appear taller. I also promise not to cross my legs and expose the red papal shoes since my feet are the least attractive feature on my body.

5. I will keep secret, until after my election, my intention to grant ordination to women and all persons regardless of sexual orientation.

6. Pedofiles are out. No exceptions.

7. I love Rome, I promise to spend lots of time there. I will balance being a home body with an extensive, exotic travel schedule demanded by the papal office.

8. I have no history in the RC church therefore my name has not been attached to any RC scandals. In the UMC my record may not be quite as clean.

My hope it to carry the Protestant voting block in the conclave. I promise to work hard and hide all things that might make myself or the church look bad to the general public. May the force be with me as together we can write my name in white smoke.

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We were set to interview candidates from a pool of clergy and find a new hire for a local church. Word came down from on high. “Men wear ties and women appropriate business attire. “We want these candidates to take us seriously so let’s dress as professionals.” True enough, we are “professional clergy.” In calling a colleague on the phone I had to go through the receptionist and 2 secretaries to talk with my friend, the senior pastor. I have been derided for wearing a nice silk shirt to a funeral, “Why are you not wearing a tie…. Don’t you have any respect?” I sat before a bishop who lectured male clergy about making sure their socks came all the way up their calves so, in sitting down with legs crossed, no skin would show. In many traditions, pastors are expected to have, at the minimum, a master’s degree. It is true for doctors and lawyers so why not clergy? Aren’t we one of the three professions and don’t we want to be taken seriously?

Douglas Fitch said years ago, “The church went wrong when we insisted on professional clergy rather than servant ministers.” Doug nailed it! We have been so hung up about”looking professional” and “acting professional” that we have lost our capacity to be servant ministers. Jesus says we are to serve the least, last and the lost. Can’t we do that in slacks and a golf shirt, or does it require a tie and business suit? (or for women clergy, heels and a power suit?) I have clergy friend who wears a coat and tie every time he walks out the door. I wondered out loud, “how can he do that?” Another friend said, “he’s not wearing a coat and tie. I have known that guy for years. That is a tatoo!”

As for me and my house, I continue to wear a pull over shirt with my suit on Sunday morning. I will not choke myself with a tie in the 100 degree summers of Arizona, and I will leave the doctoral robe in the closet when I lead worship. Servant ministers are real, relational, and relevant. Professional clergy are distant, aloof, and inaccessible. In the church for tomorrow, we are looking for servant ministers. We don’t need any more professional clergy.

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Declining churches do not choose their leaders wisely. In a leadership committee meeting it is often overheard “Let’s nominate Barbara, having a leadership position might reactivate her attendance at worship,” or “I nominate Bill, it will serve him right for missing tonight’s meeting,” (followed by a round of good natured laughter). Behaviors like this are deadly. When we say and do these things we have condemned our local church to ongoing decline. The worst offense, however, is when we nominate someone just to fill a slot.

In one church there was an angry man who had no relational skills nominated and elected to be president of the local church men’s group. Over the years, new leaders had not been groomed from within the group and no one else wanted to serve. The group began with 20 men in regular attendance each month and within 3 years was done to 4 loyal, lifelong churchmen. Those who remained were there out of duty and not because there was any hope to make new disciples of Jesus for the transformation of the world.

In still another church there was a woman who during choir practice had been known to throw her music across the room. She had cursed out other local church leaders and called them liars. She refused to “play well with others” and consequently, no one wanted to work with her. Yet she  named herself as leader for the local church Fall Festival. No one would challenge her because they were afraid of her angry outbursts. In addition no one challenged her because none of the long term leaders of that church was willing to take on the job themselves. Predictably, the Fall Festival was no longer an outreach tool and the local church continued its precipitous decline.

It is better not to have a men’s group then to have one led by someone clearly not gifted for the job. It is better not to have a Fall Festival when your leader is not only ineffective but openly contemptuous of the goals for the Fall Festival. The message is “Do not do any ministry if effective leadership is not available for the task.” Find team players. Grow leaders from within your newest disciples. Wait until next year if your current pool of leaders is not adequate for the experience. Every local church participant is not a leader and some who believe they are called to leadership have yet to demonstrate basic leadership gifts. Avoid disaster, cancel the activity, and grow new leaders ASAP.

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In the United Methodist Church we are now paying for what we do not want or need. Our General Boards and Agencies broadcast their primary purpose as “…… resource leaders for local churches.” General Board of Discipleship, General Board of Global Ministries, General Board of Higher Education Ministries and General Board of Communications are all resource sites where local churches may explore to find ministry consultants for help. Indeed, these boards have plenty of staff persons, standing at the ready, to assist in whatever local church ministry questions might arise. What a wonderful gift, if only it would work.

Hear this story coming out of Texas; A local church leader received notice that th UMC was holding a conference covering ministry to the poor. The pastor called a representative from the board and asked if he could bring some lay persons to this event.

“Yes we would be glad to have anyone from your church attend,” the pleasant voice responded “We even have a participant discount for churches that bring as many as 5 persons.”

“No Ma’am, (the guy is from Texas, they say Ma’am all the time) I believe you misunderstand. I have 5 persons I would like to brig who are all desperately poor. They have lived in poverty for many years. I thought they might be able to teach, or at least, sit on a panel with your experts during a workshop session.”

“Have they received the training and are they certified?” the voice asked, showing some concern

“Training and certification?” the pastor questioned “I don’t understand.”

“What I mean is have they received the training in poverty from our  leaders in Nashville?” the voice continued

“No, they have not received the denomination’s training in poverty, they are not certified by the denomination as poverty leaders. They are desperately poor and I thought, healthy, articulate church leaders who have experienced poverty firsthand would be great additions to your leadership.”

“I am sorry, we only use those who have received training and certification through Nashville as our poverty leaders.”

Stunned the pastor closed the conversation with “Well, I guess there is nothing more to say.”

The church for tomorrow believes that if you want to know what it is like to be poor, you find someone who lives in desperate poverty to teach you, not some denominational executive from Nashville.

What do you think? Do the General boards and agencies of the church serve us well? Are we paying for what we do not want or need?

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